last few hours

quoted from my teacher

"how much effort you put in doesn't matter, but what matters most is how you gonna submit the paper"

(:

an apple a day kicks the doctor away

but will it kick my regrets away too? i wished i could.

why am i so insensitive towards her? i wished i had done the right thing from start of last year.

i think i have hurt both sides of them :x

madness

school is equivalent to hell. at least, for the past 2 days

yesterday was a day that a lot of peeps were sent for "capital punishment" by our chairman. and it seemed as if he was trying to start a "cultural revolution".

he criticised students who were inappropriately attired. he criticised other schools saying that their students are ill disciplined. he made an hour long speech just to give time for his subordinates to "capture the criminals". and it turned out that 100 odd people had to parade in front of the crowd to be shamed by the chairman.

and today was another day of nightmare. staff were told to go for an urgent conference at 2.15pm and consultations have to be cancelled. it was rumoured to be some predictions of the potential candidates to be retained and to take the a levels in 2008. i have overheard one conversation of one female staff (i decline to disclose her name to protect her privacy) who had actually told one student that as long as he has improved in one subject during a levels, it's good enough and he could try it again next year. well said statement, given the fact that the guy didn't deserve to get promoted last year and yet he still got promoted. serves him right to waste $500 actually. but somehow i find that the staff have misplaced the kindness mask they had put on for the past 2 years in front of us.

and i realise that the hell gates will be closed for j2s officially from friday onwards. unless they want to visit hell, they need not report to the staff anymore. YAY

moody

time flies.

day by day, i see sunrise and sunset. and till date i still remembered the number of days i started countdown with. 209.

now. i stare at the clock, following the circular motion of the second hand. and as the second hand moves one round, 60 seconds have passed.

ok i think i shall just get straight to my point.

exam fever is heating up

and now i am still troubled by the fact that i am trying damn hard to compress the notes into my RAM. and it's still processing. and just today my granny fell in the middle of the night just when she was trying to carry one bucket of water. ouch.

supposed to be mugging. but now, i gotta take care of her.

if only that i have the chance

to rewind time
to cherish things
to learn to love

i won't be right here regretting for all the stuff now.

yes. there were 3 brothers who don't exist together.
lose, regret, cherish

i have lost myself to time. i have lost my childhood years. i lost my chances to lead a better life

i regret. i shouldn't have gone to jj. i regret what i have done during last year's 1st 3 months. and my greatest regret was to waste my sec school years away.

i admit i didn't cherish my choices in life.

yes. i am hating myself for the fact that i suck in all these.